Allow me to soak in each precious moment with those I cherish, help me remember their soft voices of advice and kind smiles of understanding. Lord, I am ever thankful for your love and even though at times it has been hard to follow your path I thank you for never leaving my side. I'm begininning to really see your work in our family's lives over the last 4 years and the little and big lessons that we needed to learn while being home. As I recongnize those lessons and blessings a little piece of peace fills my heart telling me that everything is going to work out. That peace is really what is guiding our family right now and I am so very thankful to you that you are givng it to me just at the perfect times. Lord fill me with your strength as you have provided during this very stressful time. Lord please fill our home with a wonderful person, we've realized that we needed to just listen to you Lord and allow you to fill our home with either a renter or a buyer and not demand one or another. So we truly give it all up to you and may you place that person in our path. May you continue to use me Lord where ever you need me to be, may my actions glorify your name. In Jesus' Name, Amen
This is a typical prayer from me that I say when things in life are piling up, which for me lately has been at least 5 times a day. Praying my way through each day has really proven to help make my days a bit more manageable and not as lonely. Yes, lonely. Even though I know my Lord is right there beside me it doesn't take from the fact that there has been lots on my plate and it has just been me to handle it all physically. Many people say to me daily, "Wow, I don't know how you do it. You are so strong" and this statement was really bothering me I'd typically respond "Ohhhh, I'm not any stronger than you" and the person saying it would look at me strangely. I've never ever been good with compliments and I'm not sure if they were trying to compliment me or comfort me. But either way I couldn't put my finger as to why I was feeling so bothered by it every time someone said that. Until my friend Bonnie gave me the book "God Strong" by Sara Horn.
It was one of "those" days. You know what I am talking about when you had to been in 50 places at once, nothing was going good and to top it off the kids were sick. As I was getting it all done for the house, kids, bills, etc, etc, I had checked my facebook mail and there was an invite reminder from my friend Bonnie about this Prayer group that they had been doing for months. My first thought was "No way, with all that is on my plate. I can't possibly add another". Though as the day progressed and my Momma was going to be here anyways to help with the kids after work it began to jump into my head. "Prayer Group". Man I really could use a time to prayer for others right now, since my prayer list seemed a mile long. It has always helped me to pray for others during my own struggles. So when 7:30pm started rolling around I barely slipped out the door and made it to the meeting, which I think I was like the third one to arrive! Whew! Wasn't the late one like always! :) When Bonnie arrived one of the first things she did was hand me the book, just casually with not too many words said. I graciously thanked her and tucked it into my purse. The meeting was wonderful and it certainly was just what I needed, I filled my prayer book with the needs of others and I felt SO filled up with the holy spirit when I left. As I walked in the door and thanked my Momma for watching my sleeping kiddos, I sat down with the book.
As I began reading the first chapter it felt as though a window had opened in my heart and the words just came rushing in like a cool breeze. The words seemed like they were written just for me, as if someone had been reading my heart and knew just what to say. With the first chapter being a preview of what she was going to touch base upon, my heart began to race with excitement wanting to quickly read through the entire book that night. Then a soft voice said "Slow down, embrace each lesson, soak up every word". So I grabbed my highlighter and off I went to enjoy this book realizing what a blessing it truly was. Just a glimpse at one of the first things that the my blue highlighter went into action with was:
"Misconception 1: God doesn't give me more than I can bear, so it's up to me to handle it. The verse of Scripture that this saying gets its basis from is 1 Corinthians 10:13. Take a look: "No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit: he'll always be there to help you come through it." " She then talks about this verse meaning more about the temptations that we face and how we need to walk away from them.
There are many many many lessons that I am going to share over these next few months with what this book has taught me and I would very much recommend you to read it if you feel you are in need of a new perspective with your relationship with God. It is aimed for the military spouse but I could soooooo see many of my friends reading and taking away very valuable lessons. I've realized that the strength that I feel inside of me during each moment of weakness or moment of stress is not my own and it comes from my heavenly father, He should be receiving all of those comments about how "Strong" I am. For I am a sinner, I am weak, I am lost and through my God I am loved, strong and forever his daughter. I am amazed taht I am a little over half way done with this book, with each page having some sort of blue message highlighted on it. With my life being so crazy, I am still finding the time to spend with this book, my bible, the Prayer Group and most importantly my relationship with my God.
Crazy is a very modest word to describe the month of June. With 3 birthday parties, play dates, moving, work, family plans, selling/renting the house, kiddos being sick, and everything else that June brought; crazy doesn't really touch it! It surely has been a jammed packed month and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. I've gotten to spend so much quality time with each person whom I cherish. These past four years have brought so many wonderful people into my life and have made lifetime friendships with. It truly has been a blessing being home even though at times it surely felt completely the opposite. How awesome is it that we got to spend four years growing strong roots for our family in our home town. And as we face the time that we are going to have to head onto our next adventure; I am truly thankful for each and every moment. Good and bad. For I have grown in ways that I didn't think were ever possible for me, in ways that I never thought that I could. We've faced some not so good things while being home death, drama, tragedy, sadness though looking back on them I can see the lesson in each and how each person has grown from it. Finally I know who I am and can see my path that the Lord has set in front of me, finally I can be me.
It is completely okay that I have an entrepreneurial spirit, with both of my own businesses. It is okay that I give everything I can to anyone who needs it with no questions asked. It is okay that I make friends quick with no judgments even if I may get hurt later. It is okay that I want to be the best Momma that I can to my kiddos even if I was a teen mom. It is okay that even though my husband and I have been through our own set of troubles, that our love for one another still is growing strong. It is ALL okay, even though there are those who say mean things and judge me before knowing the real me, there is only one judge's opinion that matters to me and we know who that is. And he loves me, sin and all, he knows my heart and still wraps his arms around me. This is the biggest lesson I've learned while being home, His love is all we need in life.
Tomorrow I will be off to get my soul mate from the airport and I pray that our travels are safe and go smoothly. The kiddos have no idea that Daddy will be coming home, they think that he will be here on Tuesday. I am SO excited to surprise them with one of the best Dad's that I know. Travis' love for his children may be hard sometimes but he really knows how to make them smile, laugh and most importantly feel his love. This is our plan to surprise them:
I am telling them I have to go and retrieve the medical records from our different Dr's offices. Which they would be really bored driving around all day. SO Nana wants to play with them so she is coming to take to the park and keeping them busy. Travis' flight is around 2:40, so I will be there to pick him up. We will stop and get something to eat. Then head home. Nana is taking them to the concert in the park for some nice music. Travis is going to ask if he can use the Mic to call up the kids or something like that and SURPRISE "Daddy is here!". Not sure about the details of the actual moment of surprise but I am certain there will be LOTS of squeals and laughter! :)
Praying that it all works out, how could it not!?! Either way the kids are going to be in shock that Daddy is home one day earlier than they expect him. Going to be so awesome. It will not feel as lonely here in the house with him here, he will get to enjoy the empty living room as our "dance studio" and join in our dance time fun.
Come Friday/Saturday time we will be packing up and getting ready to embark on our journey to Texas. Praying that we get a renter within the week and our house ready for it's new family. May we be able to enjoy these moments with our family and friends, just soaking it all in. Blessings to each of you who took to the time to read this. Know that you are being prayed for, even if it is an unspoken need. Each one of you are cherished and we have been blessed to have you in our lives. Many hugs and many "see you laters" coming up this week and I pray that we will all FEEL all that needs to be felt with peace filled hearts. May God's grace be with you.
This is a typical prayer from me that I say when things in life are piling up, which for me lately has been at least 5 times a day. Praying my way through each day has really proven to help make my days a bit more manageable and not as lonely. Yes, lonely. Even though I know my Lord is right there beside me it doesn't take from the fact that there has been lots on my plate and it has just been me to handle it all physically. Many people say to me daily, "Wow, I don't know how you do it. You are so strong" and this statement was really bothering me I'd typically respond "Ohhhh, I'm not any stronger than you" and the person saying it would look at me strangely. I've never ever been good with compliments and I'm not sure if they were trying to compliment me or comfort me. But either way I couldn't put my finger as to why I was feeling so bothered by it every time someone said that. Until my friend Bonnie gave me the book "God Strong" by Sara Horn.
It was one of "those" days. You know what I am talking about when you had to been in 50 places at once, nothing was going good and to top it off the kids were sick. As I was getting it all done for the house, kids, bills, etc, etc, I had checked my facebook mail and there was an invite reminder from my friend Bonnie about this Prayer group that they had been doing for months. My first thought was "No way, with all that is on my plate. I can't possibly add another". Though as the day progressed and my Momma was going to be here anyways to help with the kids after work it began to jump into my head. "Prayer Group". Man I really could use a time to prayer for others right now, since my prayer list seemed a mile long. It has always helped me to pray for others during my own struggles. So when 7:30pm started rolling around I barely slipped out the door and made it to the meeting, which I think I was like the third one to arrive! Whew! Wasn't the late one like always! :) When Bonnie arrived one of the first things she did was hand me the book, just casually with not too many words said. I graciously thanked her and tucked it into my purse. The meeting was wonderful and it certainly was just what I needed, I filled my prayer book with the needs of others and I felt SO filled up with the holy spirit when I left. As I walked in the door and thanked my Momma for watching my sleeping kiddos, I sat down with the book.
As I began reading the first chapter it felt as though a window had opened in my heart and the words just came rushing in like a cool breeze. The words seemed like they were written just for me, as if someone had been reading my heart and knew just what to say. With the first chapter being a preview of what she was going to touch base upon, my heart began to race with excitement wanting to quickly read through the entire book that night. Then a soft voice said "Slow down, embrace each lesson, soak up every word". So I grabbed my highlighter and off I went to enjoy this book realizing what a blessing it truly was. Just a glimpse at one of the first things that the my blue highlighter went into action with was:
"Misconception 1: God doesn't give me more than I can bear, so it's up to me to handle it. The verse of Scripture that this saying gets its basis from is 1 Corinthians 10:13. Take a look: "No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit: he'll always be there to help you come through it." " She then talks about this verse meaning more about the temptations that we face and how we need to walk away from them.
There are many many many lessons that I am going to share over these next few months with what this book has taught me and I would very much recommend you to read it if you feel you are in need of a new perspective with your relationship with God. It is aimed for the military spouse but I could soooooo see many of my friends reading and taking away very valuable lessons. I've realized that the strength that I feel inside of me during each moment of weakness or moment of stress is not my own and it comes from my heavenly father, He should be receiving all of those comments about how "Strong" I am. For I am a sinner, I am weak, I am lost and through my God I am loved, strong and forever his daughter. I am amazed taht I am a little over half way done with this book, with each page having some sort of blue message highlighted on it. With my life being so crazy, I am still finding the time to spend with this book, my bible, the Prayer Group and most importantly my relationship with my God.
Crazy is a very modest word to describe the month of June. With 3 birthday parties, play dates, moving, work, family plans, selling/renting the house, kiddos being sick, and everything else that June brought; crazy doesn't really touch it! It surely has been a jammed packed month and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. I've gotten to spend so much quality time with each person whom I cherish. These past four years have brought so many wonderful people into my life and have made lifetime friendships with. It truly has been a blessing being home even though at times it surely felt completely the opposite. How awesome is it that we got to spend four years growing strong roots for our family in our home town. And as we face the time that we are going to have to head onto our next adventure; I am truly thankful for each and every moment. Good and bad. For I have grown in ways that I didn't think were ever possible for me, in ways that I never thought that I could. We've faced some not so good things while being home death, drama, tragedy, sadness though looking back on them I can see the lesson in each and how each person has grown from it. Finally I know who I am and can see my path that the Lord has set in front of me, finally I can be me.
It is completely okay that I have an entrepreneurial spirit, with both of my own businesses. It is okay that I give everything I can to anyone who needs it with no questions asked. It is okay that I make friends quick with no judgments even if I may get hurt later. It is okay that I want to be the best Momma that I can to my kiddos even if I was a teen mom. It is okay that even though my husband and I have been through our own set of troubles, that our love for one another still is growing strong. It is ALL okay, even though there are those who say mean things and judge me before knowing the real me, there is only one judge's opinion that matters to me and we know who that is. And he loves me, sin and all, he knows my heart and still wraps his arms around me. This is the biggest lesson I've learned while being home, His love is all we need in life.
Tomorrow I will be off to get my soul mate from the airport and I pray that our travels are safe and go smoothly. The kiddos have no idea that Daddy will be coming home, they think that he will be here on Tuesday. I am SO excited to surprise them with one of the best Dad's that I know. Travis' love for his children may be hard sometimes but he really knows how to make them smile, laugh and most importantly feel his love. This is our plan to surprise them:
I am telling them I have to go and retrieve the medical records from our different Dr's offices. Which they would be really bored driving around all day. SO Nana wants to play with them so she is coming to take to the park and keeping them busy. Travis' flight is around 2:40, so I will be there to pick him up. We will stop and get something to eat. Then head home. Nana is taking them to the concert in the park for some nice music. Travis is going to ask if he can use the Mic to call up the kids or something like that and SURPRISE "Daddy is here!". Not sure about the details of the actual moment of surprise but I am certain there will be LOTS of squeals and laughter! :)
Praying that it all works out, how could it not!?! Either way the kids are going to be in shock that Daddy is home one day earlier than they expect him. Going to be so awesome. It will not feel as lonely here in the house with him here, he will get to enjoy the empty living room as our "dance studio" and join in our dance time fun.
Come Friday/Saturday time we will be packing up and getting ready to embark on our journey to Texas. Praying that we get a renter within the week and our house ready for it's new family. May we be able to enjoy these moments with our family and friends, just soaking it all in. Blessings to each of you who took to the time to read this. Know that you are being prayed for, even if it is an unspoken need. Each one of you are cherished and we have been blessed to have you in our lives. Many hugs and many "see you laters" coming up this week and I pray that we will all FEEL all that needs to be felt with peace filled hearts. May God's grace be with you.
